Just like most of ya’ll, I grew up spending most fall Saturdays either making the drive to see “the game” or watching “the game” on the tele. Dad would pack us all in his hideous Datsun station wagon at the crack of dawn and we would sweat for four hours, while trying not to touch each other packed three across the back seat, only to arrive in a cluster of traffic. Then, mom would throw a quilt on the ground, we’d eat some fried chicken and then trek to the stadium for “the game”. Even though we were four hours away, we always saw tons of people we knew. We’d stop by the best tail-gating parties (and still, to this day, do) that our fancy friends threw and then watched “the game”. I just described a typical Saturday for most of us growing up, especially in the south. Football, “the game”, it meant a lot. It’s a way of life here. I’m not sure I would have married the hubs had he gone to Carolina, it just wouldn’t have been right. What would I have told my family? My friends? The horror!
But, luckily, I didn’t have to ditch the hubs based on his college football team (his college doesn’t have one—isn’t that the strangest thing you have ever heard?). No, it wasn’t a problem at all…because…and I know this may be hard to read, but stick with me here…he doesn’t like football. Could. Care. Less. “The game” means something ENTIRELY different to him. And I have NEVER seen a football fan who loves their team as much as this man love his (please see our garage, the massive flags that hang out front, everything that we buy must be either: black, red, or white and/or black, red and white). Yes, ya’ll, I’m talking about futbol. And because I’ve been with an obsessed fan now for about 15 years, I’ve…and this is hard for me to say…converted. I know, it’s shocking…please still love me anyway. As the entire world obsessively watches the World Cup, allow me to share with you what’s good about “the game”. Here are a few reasons why this off kilter belle loves the beautiful game and why you should to:
- This should maybe be the most obvious: there is no break for commercials during a soccer game. Ever go to a televised football game? It takes…for…freaking…ever…it’s the worst! No momentum. No build up. No fatigued players battling for their lives…just a bunch of huge dudes standing around while the rest of the world outside the stadium watches a toilet paper commercial. This does not happen in futbol. There are 2 halves. They are 45 minutes each. They are played without stop. Commercials only air during a 15 minute halftime break.
- As mentioned above players play straight for 45 minutes. They are tired, they are pushing the boundaries of what is physically possible, they are running their faces off. And it’s amazing to watch.
- The build. It’s so freaking hard to score, if your team even comes CLOSE, you freak out. I mean, freak out! And it’s so fast; things can change in a second.
- Hot foreign guys in shorts.
- Drama…do you like it? Well then futbol is the sport for you! These dudes have more personal drama than The Real Housewives. Just Google ANY professional player and watch the drama unfold. They get in fights in pubs, they sleep with each other’s wives. They wreck their Maseratis. It’s great.
- Hot foreign guys in super nice tailored suits.
- The crazy ass fans. I used to think the University of Tennessee had some of the craziest fans I’ve ever seen. Then I saw the Dutch National Team’s fans. These mother fuckers are crazy! Men wearing fake boobs and blond wigs. Orange EVERYWHERE. Painted faces, crazy hats, songs and chants that must take years to learn, signs, banners, cannons, flares, mania…its bananas! And it’s SUPER entertaining to see.
- When someone you love a whole lot sees their team win the World Cup. I think I’ve said it before; it was literally the happiest day of his life. And I love that about him, because I know how much he loves me (and it’s a lot, BTW), so I KNOW how much it meant to him to see Italy win in 2006.
- There are some really incredible stories out there about some of these players. These fellas come from all over the world, some of them raised in some terrible conditions, and now they are on an international stage making millions of dollars and returning tons of charity to their war torn nations. It’s pretty amazing.
- The enormous popularity. As Americans we tend to not notice what other nations are doing. So, I’ll tell you what they are doing…they are watching futbol. The rest of the entire planet is completely obsessed. During the World Cup, nations stop fighting wars so they can watch the games. Seriously ya’ll, cease fires for a soccer game. This happens. It’s amazing to be a part of something that is so feverously popular that it engulfs most of the planet. I’m a part of The Jack Army…who’s army will you join? So, this summer, while there is no football, there is futbol and all of it’s beautiful glory…you don’t have to turncoat, you can enjoy both…and I promise, it doesn’t make you any less southern.
Ciao Y’all 